mrskarp replied to your post: Why am I even alive when everything is so…
why didn’t it work what i thought i’d changed it? do you want me to try again?
please do
Why am I even alive when everything is so unbearable?
never going to get better, never going to be happy
fucking hate everything
I just can’t cope, I just can’t, someone make the pain go away
crying because pressure
i don’t get why people are nice to me when i’m such a cunt
I don’t understand what my life is
I feel so alien and like I’m not really here, I’m not really living it
I feel so so different to everyone else, I feel like everyone looks down on me and patronises me, like I could never be equal to anyone
I feel like everyone treats me in a way that alienates me and prevents me from every being happy, and from ever feeling comfortable around people and from ever being happy
Baring one small hour break, I’ve worked all day today, and I will work until I go to sleep, because that’s all I have left, my education, and I hate it, I hate it so much, I can’t go on like this, I physically can’t cope with the work, but I have to pretend to be okay because everyone thinks I’m clever, and that’s the only thing anyone likes or respects me for, although most people mock it
The only other thing I have is football, and I’m hated for saying anything about it, and only I will ever be able to understand my feelings and emotions towards my team. Only me.
I really am struggling.
Okay I’m just going to turn everything off and have a sleep or a cry or something bye bye
